Memoirs of a Christian Entrepreneur: The Thunderstorm Miracle
Several years ago I had an amazing experience on a jobsite that was nothing short of a miracle. I was working with two other guys on an inground pool project during the ‘dog days’ of summer. It was mid afternoon and we were working to complete a portion of the job that would be absolutely destroyed if it rained. But there was no rain in the forecast and we were making good progress....no worries right? At least until we heard a clap of thunder in the distance.
If you know anything about concrete work you know perfectly well what that sound does to your blood pressure in situations like this. I immediately stopped what I was doing and looked up to discover the other two guys glaring at me with that ‘deer in the headlights' look. Within 5 minutes the storm was right on top of us, the thunder was so loud it was rattling the windows, and the rain was starting to fall.
Now let me tell you a little bit about the two guys I was working with. One was a great friend whom I attend church with. We relished the idea of working together because, if you work construction at all, you know that many of the guys in that field aren’t exactly uplifting to work around. The other guy pretty much fell into that category. He was a great dude, but not exactly on the straight and narrow (I ain’t judging, I’m just sayin’).
So the rain is really starting to come down and I started barking orders to get everything covered up. We all scrambled to preserve what had taken us three days to accomplish when the bottom just fell out. It was a torrential downpour. At that point I don’t know what went through my mind but I just looked at the guys and said “Stop! We’re going to pray.”
So here we are, three guys standing in a downpour with lightning touching down all around us while our work is on the verge of utter ruin and we decide we’re going to pray. Probably not the first thing that comes to mind....huh? That's what the one guy was thinking because he looked at me and said “What! You’ve got to be freaking crazy!” We rather enthusiastically encourage him to stand in and he reluctantly walked over shaking his head in disgust, but he did join us.
By the time we finished the prayer the rain had stopped and within 30 seconds the clouds had parted and the sun was shining. The job was fine. I kid you not!
What do you think was going though the guys mind?
I can tell you exactly what was going through his mind because he shared it with us.
He said that it was the most amazing thing he had ever seen in his life. That it was an absolute miracle and any doubts he had about the reality of God were resolved because he had seen His work first hand. Talk about a wake-up call!
Why am I writing this?
The short answer is to bring glory to God. The long answer is because I believe that Christian Business Owners have a unique opportunity to bless the lives of others and to accomplish God’s work. I consider this experience sacred because, along with many other experiences, it has helped sure the foundation of my faith. But it is only one small example of the miracles that can occur and the impact that we can have on people’s lives if we are willing to exercise our faith within the parameters of our businesses. I’m not talking about preaching it; I’m talking about living it. No, we’re not perfect and yes, we all screw up. But that’s not the point. The point is that every day we have chances to exercise our faith. Whether it’s during a rainstorm on a jobsite, on a difficult phone call with a client, or in making key strategic decisions for the future of our business, God wants to be involved. He will work miracles that will bless our lives as well as those around us.
What awesome experiences have you had in your life or in your business?
The Soap Bubble Incident
Endless possibilities!
In case you don’t know, the Hughes’ are “that family” in church. You know, the ones you try to avoid sitting near because it guarantees you’ll miss 90% of the message that day. We have literally came into church, sat down, and had the people sitting in front of us get up and move to the other side of the chapel….no joke.
In our defense we do have four kids and one on the way, plus my mother-in-law brings three other grandchildren. So we are outnumbered by little kids 7 to 3. At that point you have to switch from man-to-man to zone, and you’re pretty much give up on complete silence and go into damage control mode during the entire service to try to prevent a total melt-down. I personally love it and wouldn’t have it any other way, but in an attempt to improve our behavior at church we try to practice being reverent in our weekly Family Home Evenings.
One particular evening, Chrissy and I were trying especially hard to teach this principle, so we patiently spoke with the children at length about the importance of sitting still and being quiet. We had chairs lined up for them in the living room and asked them to practice perfect behavior during our short lesson.
Needless to say, it didn’t go well. Right off the bat there was restlessness, laughing, and even kids falling out of chairs. We tried to keep our cool, but we finally reached our breaking point after seeing that all of our efforts were having no effect. One of us, I won’t say who, lost it and had everyone march into the kitchen where a liberal dose of dish liquid was promptly administered to the mouths of three children.
After weeping, wailing, and gnashing of some very clean teeth we all went back into the living room to resume the lesson. I was in the center of the room and the kids were once again lined up in their chairs. For emphasis, I was sure to re-iterate the importance of being reverent in a short stern lecture. Now they knew we meant business….they were sure to straighten up. After concluding the lecture I asked if they were ready to start behaving. I looked over at them to find that all three had blown spit bubbles about the size of their heads with their soapy saliva.
What can you do at that point? There are only two options: you either explode with anger, or with laughter. We all busted out in hysterical laughter and ended up having a great lesson. Sometimes we need to remember that there’s more to the living the gospel than the way we look and act in church.
How about you? Does this remind you of anything you've had happen in your home?
Until next time, God Bless!
Do I Love Sushi more than My Kids?
I got all rolled up into myself!
The other night I was trying to make sushi rolls for dinner. I emphasize the word “trying”.
If you’ve never done this before, imagine trying to roll your dinner up in a sticky piece of wet tape. Even though I have successfully pulled this off on several previous occasions, it wasn’t going well this go around. The stupid things were falling apart and it turns out I had more rice stuck to my arms than in the sushi! And to make matters worse I had spectators. Two of my sons wanted to watch ‘the master’ whip up some sushi (I whipped it all right).
I was under a lot of pressure and found myself becoming more frustrated by the minute. And would you believe that right in the middle of all this my six year old had the nerve to ask me questions? The audacity! And he wouldn’t quit….question after question after question. Plus he was fidgeting!
I just couldn’t work under those conditions. I told him that if he couldn’t sit still and be quiet he would have to leave the room. And guess what? 5 seconds later he was back at it!
That was it; I told him he had to leave. And that’s what he did. He quietly got up and walked out. After standing there in silence, I came to the realization that at that moment I was not only failing at sushi, but also as a father.
What was going through his little mind?
“Dad loves that sushi more than he loves me.” That’s what he was thinking. Dang that stings!
I know this is not exactly a case of child abuse, but it demonstrates an important point:
Our children see anything that draws our attention away from them as competition for our love.
Through the lens of a six year old, this sushi incident was pretty black and white. “I want to spend time with dad, but he doesn’t want me around because I’m less important to him than what he’s doing.”
Of course that’s not true, but perhaps it’s not entirely false. Nothing in this world could ever be more important to me than my children. But let’s take a closer look at what really happened. If I’m being perfectly honest with myself, I would have to admit that in the heat of the moment, I placed more value on getting dinner completed than on my son’s feelings. I justified my behavior by thinking that what I was doing was really important, that he’ll get over it soon enough and probably forget it even happened.
That’s what we do right? We rationalize; we try to convince ourselves that there’s a good reason to do a bad thing.
But there is only way to describe my behavior: selfish! It’s so easy to get caught up in what we’re doing and put ourselves first.
So who are your children’s competitors?
Maybe you’ve never had a similar incident with raw fish, but there’s a good chance you can relate to my story. What competes with your child for your attention?...a hobby?....career?....television? We all have a plethora of things in our lives pandering for our attention, and many of them are legitimate. But that’s not the point. We need to demonstrate to our kids through our actions that our love is unconditional. They only know what we show. We do this by making the most of the opportunities we have with them, and quite simply putting their feelings before our own selfish wants and desires.
If I had a second chance, I would forget about trying to form a perfect sushi roll and focus more on involving him in the process and just have fun with it! Wouldn’t that send a different message to an impressionable child?
The great news is that we do have second chances….and third, and fourth, and fifth chances. It’s never too late to change. It’s never too late to improve a relationship. Kids are very forgiving, that’s probably why we take their feelings for granted so often. But there comes a point in a relationship where too many withdrawals from the emotional bank account result in bitterness and a loss of trust. Let’s not let that happen with our children. We love them too much. Let’s make sure we show it.
I'd be interested to hear your take on this. Maybe your a sushi freak and see nothing wrong with it. Please comment below.
Pets, Poops, and the Afterlife
When my oldest son Grayson was three years old he had a pet goldfish that had unfortunately met his demise. This was his first experience with death and gave his mother and I the opportunity to explain how our time on earth comes to an end, the afterlife, and God’s Love for His creatures. After discussing this for a while we made sure to emphasize that his goldfish was in a better place and would be happy in heaven. We then went to the bathroom to give the beloved fish a proper burial. Tears fell from Grayson’s face as he watched his pet swirl around the commode until finally disappearing into the abyss.
Grayson seemed somber for the remainder of the day, but the next morning he was back to his normal chipper self. Being newly potty trained, he still required assistance when using the bathroom so when the time came, his Mom accompanied him to the potty. After finishing his business he stood up, flushed the toilet, and promptly exclaimed “Yeah, my poo-poo is going to heaven!”
We still laugh about that one to this day!
Have any cool little stories from your family?
Christian Business Owners: Who’s Your CEO?
by: Jason Hughes
Are you standing out from the crowd?
My prior posts have been mainly dedicated to spiritual insights and stories regarding personal and family Christian living. But I have neglected to discuss an aspect of my life that equally identifies who I am as a person: a Christian Entrepreneur.
My personal feeling is that for many Christian people (especially business owners), the ultimate test of devotion to God is integrity in the workplace. That’s where you either put up, or shut up…right? In what other situation do you find yourself 100% accountable with such clear lines between right and wrong? You are either going to fix the mistake or you’re not; you are either going to tell your customer the truth or you’re not; you are either going to stand behind your product or you’re not.
This is why virtually all “Christian” business owners are polarized: they are either scumbags or saints. And who do the people in the marketplace see? The scumbags! I know the good guys are out there, in fact I think you’re reading this post.
It would be great for the guys in white hats to connect, share experiences, and support each other. I have such relationships with other entrepreneurs and it has served as a huge spiritual resource for all involved. Really, who else would understand some of the stuff we go through? But we’ll get back to that. First, here’s my story:
I am the co-founder and co-owner of River Pools and Spas located in Virginia. We specialize in inground pool marketing, sales, and construction. I have two great business partners and we have been in business since 2001. Despite our many screw-ups, we have managed to become a major player in the marketplace and are one of the top 100 pool builders in America. We currently give all of our inground pool customers as references, over 600 and counting, and have taken some significant hits in the past to make that a reality. Over the past decade we have persevered through a substantial embezzlement, 9/11, some major business mistakes, and our current economic crisis. We live by the mantra, “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”.
I can honestly say that the experiences I have had as a business owner have tempered my character and brought me closer to God. But I believe that’s exactly the point, not just of owning a business, but of life. Trusting God despite what the world or even your own logic might tell you, and trying to do what’s right regardless of the circumstances is the essence of being a Christian business owner. This can only happen if God is the CEO of your company….and your life.
I have two goals for this article: to reach out to other like-minded business people and to discuss some of the guiding principles that form our business philosophy. Here are some of our core operating principles:
God is the CEO
My partners and I may own the company, but we ultimately know who runs things. We hold weekly meetings where many critical business decisions are made. We always open the meeting with prayer and a spiritual thought just to insure we are humbled (hopefully) and open to inspiration. Granted, we screw up all the time, but I can honestly say that our desire is to direct our business affairs according to God’s will.
Personal Development
We believe that you should always work harder on yourself than you do on your job….and we teach this to our employees as well. To use a metaphor, if God is the GPS that directs our company, personal development is the engine that propels the vehicle. I cannot begin to express the profound impact that this mentality has had on my life, the lives of my partners, and our business. John Maxwell teaches the Law of the Lid, that you create your own leadership limitations through your own lack of development. Seeking the greatest books, classes, seminars, mentors, and any other positive influence can absolutely change your life. Stephen Covey teaches that to sharpen the saw is the most renewing and rejuvenating activity one can do.
An Abundance Mentality
I believe that there is plenty of room at the top; it’s the bottom that’s crowded! You can’t improve an industry too much and you can’t make a customer too happy. There is no such thing as a pie with a limited amount of pieces….the pie is infinite.
Educate, Educate, Educate!
We believe that to empower someone with the information they want is to earn their trust. We have devoted huge amounts of energy to teaching anyone who is willing to listen everything we know about our industry.
This includes the consumer as well as other pool builders. We literally embrace transparency: full disclosure of all information we have. Sound crazy? As greenies in the industry, we learned everything the hard way (in business terms that means spending a ton of money to fix mistakes), and it’s not necessary for anyone to re-invent the wheel….if they are willing to try.
The same applies to the consumer. They make mistakes too which leads to buyer’s remorse or long term regret that can be avoided if they have the information need to make an educated decision.
What about trade secrets? It’s a funny thing; about 90% of the business owners in most industries have no interest in improving themselves or their businesses. And only about 20% of the ones that are interested will actually do anything with the information. I think that’s insane, but it’s true! Notwithstanding, we have seen first-hand that the more you give the more you receive. To get a feel for how we do this check our web site.
No Emotional Baggage
We believe in instant feedback. No matter what happens between my partners and me we have an agreement that if something is bothering us, it must be addressed immediately and not allowed to fester. This is the craziest thing because during our “heated discussions” we speak our mind, come to a resolution, and are buddy-buddy again in a matter of minutes.
We understand that our relationship goes far beyond any singular issue that may arise within the business, so it’s not personal. The same applies with employees. Giving instant feedback removes negative feelings before they begin to eat at you like a cancer. I must admit this is a trait I’ve had to work to develop and I still have room for improvement, but it is critical to the success of any relationship.
When in doubt, Suck it Up!
We try to run our business in such a way that we can look at ourselves in the mirror at night. But operating a business with integrity is not always easy. We have to meet the needs of the accountant, employees, customers, not to mention our own family. Notwithstanding, we have found that when an issue arises, it’s best to ere on the side of the customer. Our policy is that if there is even a reasonable doubt who’s accountable, we accept responsibility. This might not make good business sense, but it makes good Christian sense.
Well that’s our business philosophy in a nutshell. Hopefully you can see that we do our best to integrate Christian values into our company. So, do we have anything in common? If so, I’d like to hear insights and experiences from your business or profession. Comment below or shoot me an email. Take care and God Bless!
3 Problems with Prayer
What can we learn from a childs prayer?
I think there’s a lot of applicable truth to Christ’s teaching to become as little children. As adults we tend to seriously over complicate things. Look at prayer for example. Kids get it right. They know who they are talking to, they say what they feel, and that’s it. What a great example! The problem is that as adults we refuse to believe anything can be that simple. We allow our mind to create doubts and concerns that inhibit our ability to communicate with God. As a result our prayers lose their vigor, or even worse, we stop praying all together.
Here are three common questions we tend to have about prayer:
- How can God hear my prayers when there are millions of other people praying at the same time?
- Is God just a vague intelligence that keeps the universe in check, or is He really a personal God that hears my prayers?
- How can I continue to pray for help or forgiveness when I constantly make mistakes?
See what I mean? When’s the last time your 4 year old dropped one of these questions on you? Seriously though, these are legitimate concerns. Let’s see what we can do to address them.
1. How is it possible for God to hear all of our prayers at the same time?
The problem is in the word “time”. When we picture God listening to our prayers, we see Him the same way we would see ourselves trying to listen to 40 screaming children asking for something in unison. The natural response would be to silence all of them, then address each child one at a time. Dang, there’s that word again!
Here’s the thing: God isn’t bound by time, He is eternal. We, on the other hand, live in time. One moment passes and is gone forever; and it’s now the past. Not so with God. All time is the present for Him. We see our existence as it passes moment by moment on a timeline; God on the other hand sees the entire page the time line is written on.
I’ll paraphrase C. S. Lewis’s wonderful illustration of this principle: Imagine you’re writing a fictional book about your main character Mary. She is sitting alone at her kitchen table, when there is a knock at the door. In Mary’s world there is no delay between the knock and her response to go and answer. But as the author, after the knock you can stop and think about Mary for three days if you like, because you are outside of her time sequence. Mary would never know the difference.
The same is true with God except He is not bound by limited metal or emotional capacities. He does focus specifically on each of us without being rushed along moment by moment. He can spend a thousand years listening to a split second thought from our heart. This is the miracle, isn’t it? Despite how small we are and how great He is, we do have His undivided attention!
2. Is the God of the Universe really a personal God?
There’s a lot of talk in today’s spiritual teachings of the universe, karma, and levels of consciousness...and frankly I’m in agreement with most of it. But if I’m being honest with myself, I must admit it annoys me that many of these teachings don’t give credit where credit is due. What I mean is that you frequently hear of a great intelligence that keeps the Universe in balance, but seldom hear that the great intelligence is in fact a Personal God. This has its spiritual implications. Why would I want to pray to a vague notion of intelligence? What would it care about my Math test, my problems at work, or my inner-most struggles? Maybe I should forget about praying and just meditate so I can bring my energy in line with it. Sorry….not trying to mock, but I’m making the point that if we don’t see the Almighty as a personal God it will affect our relationship with Him.
We have to know that He does care about the Math test. He does care about our struggles and wants us to come to Him with our inner-most concerns. We should speak to Him as personally as we speak to our spouse or our best friend. We should also listen for His counsel. He is not just a mass of great collective intellect floating somewhere in space. He is, in the truest since of the words, our Heavenly Father.
3. How can I continue to pray for help and forgiveness when I constantly screw up?
One of the biggest tools the adversary uses on me is when I become convinced that God is annoyed by my prayers.
Like God’s up there thinking:
- “Oh gosh, here goes Jason again.”
- “Yeah, you’re sorry all right….you’ve used up your last sorry bud.”
- “Help?...yeah right! What have you done with the help I’ve given you?”
When I’m having these thoughts I’m reluctant to pray with real intent, or sometimes to pray at all. I believe we all have a tendency to place our own limitations on God’s ability to bless us. We feel unworthy of His forgiveness and undeserving of His help. This is probably because we are indeed unworthy. But we also believe that He responds to our mistakes the same way we would. That’s the lie! It’s hard to comprehend unconditional love so we tend to believe it’s not possible, even by God.
I feel spiritually bankrupt!
We tend to think of our relationship with God like a checking account with a finite balance. Every time we make a mistake and ask for forgiveness, a withdrawal is made and the balance of the account diminishes. Until one day our spiritual account with Him is overdrawn.
This principle has proven true with my personal finances, but is certainly not the case with God. To be spiritually overdrawn with God would require Him to have a finite amount of love. Not so, God’s love is infinite and unconditional. This means there’s one account we have that can never be overdrawn baby….yeah! Granted, we may be in trouble if we cancel the account but that’s another story. The most profound thing to me is it seems that God sees a genuine plea for forgiveness as more of a deposit than a withdrawal. He wants us to partake of His Love.
Satan would have us believe that we are unworthy of the Atonement of Christ. This is one of the greatest lies he perpetuates. Don’t buy into it!
Let’s pay attention the next time we hear a child pray. Let’s remember their innocent faith when our minds become clouded with notions of a distracted, impersonal, or unforgiving God.
So what has kept you from praying in the past?
Have you ever struggled with one of these problems?
Thanks for visiting and until next time, God Bless!
Anyone Can Learn to Smile!
Can you believe it took me 30 years to learn how to do this!
When I was 3 years old my parents took me to an amusement park for a family outing. To this day my Mom tells the story of how she put me on a ride and I literally bit my lip to keep from smiling. I’m not surprised….in fact, learning to smile has been one of the hardest things I’ve done in my adult life. Some people have a natural smile; their face just seems to have a perpetual grin. That’s never been the case with me; at least until I decided to do something about it. I’m sure this sounds ludicrous to the natural grinners out there; but those of you who are reluctant to bare teeth should know that you can learn to smile! I found that one of the first steps was uncovering the real reasons why I had an aversion to showing emotion.
3 Reasons I didn’t Smile:
Lack of confidence
The truth is that I thought I looked silly when I smiled. In retrospect, it was like my wacky brain made smiling equivalent to wearing a pair of underwear on my head or something! I was so concerned about how I was perceived by everyone around me that I figured it was easier to show no facial emotion than to risk the chance of being rejected.
Negative reinforcement
To add salt to the wound, when I saw a picture of myself with even a hint of a smile, I hated it. I would say to myself, “If I look this stupid I’ll be sure to never do it”. I was also labeled as “the guy who never smiled” by family and friends, or accused as always being serious….which is very annoying to a guy who’s anything but.
You can start to see the vicious cycle forming.
Fear of Change
I had formed an identity around not smiling. Others had labeled me, and frankly I bought into it. Changing this would mean a total internal transformation, one that allowed me to have enough confidence to smile without concern. That sounded good, but then what about the identity? What would the labelers and accusers say? They would certainly make a comment when after years of being tight lipped I spontaneously start showing some teeth.
How the heck could I overcome all of this and put my true emotions on display for the world to see? The most frustrating part is that I was genuinely happy, laid back, and very optimistic….but this is not the image of myself I portrayed to others. This made it tough to make a strong first impression, and consequently made it difficult for a new person to get to know the real me. I finally reached a point where I resolved to overcome this personal hurdle.
How I learned to Smile
I Shifted Two Key Values
We all make decisions in life based on our value sets. For example, let’s look at how we buy clothes. Two people could have the same exact values for the clothes they purchase: comfort and style. But if they prioritize these values differently they will come out of the store with totally different outfits. For years I had valued not being rejected more than showing my emotions, so I had always played it safe and not smiled. Now I place more value on being myself than on the risk of rejection, and therefore smile and laugh at will. I still value other people’s judgment, but it’s subservient to being my true self. Essentially I’m saying: Accept me or reject me, but at least you have the real me.
I Found deeper Meaning in Life
I became ready to make this shift when I came to a realization that I was created to fulfill a specific purpose in this life. I knew I had a mission from God, and overcoming all of the obstacles standing between my current self and the version of myself that I was created to become would be necessary. One of those little hurdles for me was learning to smile, and there are many, many more left to tackle. But I’m coming to realize that it doesn’t matter what the hurdles are. If we are dedicated to fulfilling the measure of our creation, God will empower us to literally overcome anything. A personal relationship with Him will lead us to a point where we desire His will above all other things. This is the point where we are no longer controlled by fear, but by Love. And silly little things like learning to smile that seemed for years like insurmountable obstacles just fall by the wayside. With God all things are possible.
Wow, I feel like I just left a therapy session….you can send me a bill.
Seriously though, I’d like to hear what you think. Have you ever had to overcome something in your life that seemed insurmountable? Has God ever helped you through a difficulty? Until next time, take care!
3 Steps to Curing ‘Daydreaming Dad Syndrome’
Giddy-up Dad!
“Hey Dad…..Dad…..Daaaaaaaaad!”
I know when I’ve heard that for the second or third time I’m suffering from a case of ‘daydreaming dad syndrome’, or DDS for short. I'm in the same room with them, but mentally I'm not with them at all. They're playing on the floor and I'm sitting on the couch thinking about what’s for dinner, stuff at work, a cool blog idea, or anything else except what’s going on in their lives at that moment. What’s completely baffling is that I do this despite the fact that there is nothing on earth I’d rather be doing than spending quality time with my wife and kids. How can I insure that I stay present? How can I make the most of the precious time I have with my kids?
Here are 3 Steps to Curing the ‘Daydreaming Dad Syndrome’:
1. Eliminate the Distraction
Let's turn the TV off, put the Blackberry down, close the laptop and stop daydreaming….there is a time and place for those things, and there’s a time and place for our children to have our undivided attention. The first step in having quality time with our kids is to remove the things that divert our attention away from them. They can feel it too….can't they? I have had my two year old daughter position herself beside me while I was typing a work email on the blackberry and place her little hands on my cheeks and literally turn my head away from it so I was looking at her. Talk about a wake-up call! The truth is that the email can be sent later, the show can be TiVo’d, and the laptop’s not going anywhere…..it’s time to be present.
2. Have a “Yes” Mentality
“Dad can you read me a book?” “Dad will you play a board game with me?” “Dad, come check this out!” “Dad can you find batteries for my game?” “Dad, will you come ride bikes with me?”
What’s your first thought? Is it to look for the first excuse to say "no"? We always find excuses….actually we always use the same two don’t we? It’s either we’re too tired, or we don’t have time.
Let’s see:
- Am I too tired to let my child know how important they are to me?
- Am I really too busy to spare a few minutes of my time so I can get closer to my kid?
I’m sorry to say this, but I know how I'll answer when they’re grown and gone.
Dads, we need to have a “Yes” mentality. Sure, there are times when “no” is the legitimate answer, but I’m not talking about that. It’s the way we think about spending time with our kids. We need to see every appeal for our time as an opportunity. One that if taken advantage of, brings happiness and strong family bonds; and one that if consistently missed breeds resentment and regret.
3. Get Engaged
Grab some toys, jump in, and start playing with them. Learn the theme song to their favorite show and sing it with them. Tell them they can have anything they want for breakfast next Saturday and cook it for them. Built a fort out of sofa cushions and sheets and hang out in it with them. Make sock puppets and have a crazy puppet show from behind the couch with them. Get to know them; be on their level; remember what it was like to only worry about one thing: finding the perfect Lego piece to finish a cool monster robot. Sometimes I go weeks without rolling around on the floor with them like a big idiot. When I realize I’ve been a grown up for way too long and start acting crazy again, their faces light up. It’s like, ‘hey, cool….dad’s back!’ That should never happen. I should never spend a day with them without being fully engaged in their lives.
Dads, there’s no debating the fact that we have a lot on our plate. There are many distractions, we are genuinely busy, and yes even tired most of the time. But the reality is that our children see how we spend time with them as a reflection of our love. They can’t see what’s going on inside our heads, all they can see is Dad sitting there not paying any attention to me….and it hurts.
Here’s a challenge to us all, especially myself: Let’s live every day with our children as though it were our last. Let’s live every moment so when we look back when they are grown and gone we have no regrets. It’s my testimony that the spiritual and emotional welfare of our family is paramount. Our children have to know how important they are to us, they have to understand their inherent value, and they have to know they are loved by their dads. They will need all of the confidence and courage we can help them obtain, and it all begins with Lego’s and sock puppets.
As always I'm interested in what you think. Have you ever struggled with this? What have you found that helps you stay present when spending time with your children?
